Saturday, December 20, 2008

The best of both worlds

After reading KIMBOLACITY    last 2 entries I feel alittle better knowing I'm not the only one in this situation but I still feel so alone. I  hate that Jeremy wants us to bearly talk. It makes me feel insecure and jealous. Cuz if he's not talking to me who is he gonna talk to? i know who ugh. I dont want Jeremy to get closer to anyone while he's trying to push me away. I hate the way he's been acting. Trying to hard for everyone else to frickin like him. I hate that he keeps saying he wants someone to kiss on new years eve who of course isnt me cuz he would never see me. I dont want kissing someone else and i dont want him to want to kiss someone else either. He is tryng to be a flirt and it pisses me off. I want things to change and i dont want to stop until were back together. I mean there is so much change and sacarfic that needs to be made for it to work out. I'm willing to do it if he wants to be with me. I dont want to ruin things between us cuz I love him and we have Jaden.  Its so hard to not hold a grudge but im mad that he doesnt want to be with me and i show it and sound it when we talk. And why shouldnt I be jealous I dont want him talking to other chicks so he can sleep with them(Sabrina) or fall in love with them(drag queen Amalia) or want to cheat on me with(Amber) or just be a moron with(Amy). I'm sort of a hypocrite cuz there have been other guys but I never fell in love or was serious with. I told him I was gonna commit to him and I wasnt with other guys until he told me that he never wants to date me again. God and he doesnt even care.

2 comments:

Richard said...

He is obviously not ready for a serious relationship.
It's time to forget him and move on with your life. All you are doing is hurting yourself.

twentyseven said...

Girl, I know I have my ups and downs with Mr. Ex, but I will tell you this, before the blog days began when he told me he was leaving me for the other girl my pride didn't let me beg or even ask him to stay. In the 10 months all of this has gone down only 1 drunken night did I tell him to leave her. I want him, I love him, but I will never put myself down in front of him. You know cause you read the blog but he has no idea I am still heartbroken. I would like to offer you some advice from someone who has been there... If was stupid enough to walk away, be smart enough to let him go. You told me to be strong do the same. KEEP UR HEAD UP GORGEOUS!!

<3 MT

PS: Richard has the best ADVICE!