SUCK IT! Lily style

(Jeremy will probably be mad about this entry cuz of the "personal things" he said that I copied into this entry but im upset and having the worst day so i say fuck it deal with his bullshit tomm. If he even cares)

When I think me and jeremy are getting closer, he says something that just ruins all the good moments we have been having. I hate myself for having feeling for him.  Again that stupid Amber bitch said something that upset me. And I said it to him and not her and he still defends her over me. I fucking cant stand he knows that. he's a jerk. oh well, i will do whatever i please he says. I couldnt even talk to fred without him getting mad today and after he found out fred slept over he got mean. Wouldnt talk and said i was acting like a skank and wouldnt come back over cuz i would just talk to fred.

Shirley is in need of a boyfriend. 1:04pm - Comment - Show Comments (3)

 Kimberly Texidor at 1:26pm January 25

Girl please, you can do bad all by your damm self!!

 Shirley Carmona at 1:30pm January 25

a boyfriend would be nice though

 Timothy Cotton at 5:16pm January 25

omg cry you could have one if you were not so stuck on someone who no longer wants to be one.

 

tim is right sadly. I treat Jeremy like he's my boyfriend and its pointless. Jeremy said and I quote

"at this point
i want to like you more than i actually do
and this is why
you need help
you have issues
and you know it"

so i have issues now. Yea im emotional but thats it. What kind of meds are gonna help me. The get my ex bf to wanna be with me pills? come off it. 

So I start class in 12 hours and I really dont wanna go at all. Its cold and the bus will be packed and I hate waiting. Plus not sure how to get to my class and I hate Umass.

gym

The gym is the devil i tell u. My body is so sore. But i got a membership ship and im not gonna waste 10 bucks a month to never go. Its not bad and I have always gone with Jeremy cuz he also has a membership and he gives rides. yesterday we worked out for 2 hours. I almost died! my legs were like jello seriously.  The place is nice too. Its one big room with different areas. Jeremy told me to do all these leg exercises. I had to use all these leg machines when I could bearly walk as is. Its hard to go everyday cuz of Jaden and now I start school tomm.

crap

My love life isnt going so well. Got in huge fights with all three of my exs, first Jeremy then Tim, now Fred. Its annoying and confusing. can u really be friends with ur exs? cuz two out of three wanna be with me. Though all 3 would be mad if i dated someone else and same goes for me. I dont wanna hurt any of them. But i cant help but do that.

mad

I'm so mad at Jeremy. He totally ruined the day and for no reason at all. I can't stand it. He can just leave me crying and not even care. He freaks out at me then gets ms cuz I have no idea then leaves cuz I'm asking WTF! He's a jerk. I didn't do anything and he leaves and blows off our plans. then texts saying he's going to kassy and we will go to the gym later. then I find out he goes without me for 2 hours. I don't even wanna see him at all. What the fuck was he thinking?

Ahh

so tim is being a jerk

Jeremy picked up jaden from daycare and me and him hung out. went to subway. walmart, and dicks. I got some gym clothes. Me and him both got a memebership at planet fitness and then worked out a little.
It was nice.

After reading Kim's entry bathing in a tub of confusion I started thinking about Jeremy. He is so confusing. I get depressed most times i see him cuz i dont understand. Its been 5 months and I still dont even know why he hates me so much. Lately we been getting along but it doesnt usually last long. He will block me again and say he hates me so much and it sucks. I just want things good.

Tim is coming over and im going to kill him while eating mcdonalds

me and jeremy

Another weird day. started bad in the am but good now. just wish we could be together. instead he doesn't have a problem telling ppl we are never getting back together. :'(

midnight

its midnight jaden drove me crazy. I really need to clean this whole week. And Im suppose to get my new phone tomorrow! YAY! hopefully it comes even if it is a holiday.